Crown of Thorns
by mng
Summary: Damon and Elena. Set shortly after they find out Katherine isn t in the tomb. Elena looks for Damon, finds him, what happens then. I think the shows Damon and Elena comfort scene was far too short.


**Disclaimers: I own nothing but my story idea. The characters are not mine. The song used is Hurt (this version by Johnny Cash.)...listen to the song to get the mood.**

**Note: This is set shortly after they find out Katherine isn`t in the tomb.**

**This is actually the third Delena story I started...it just happened to be the first one I finished. Hope you guys enjoy it.**

A Crown of Thorns-

_I hurt myself today_

_To see if I still feel_

_I focus on the pain-_

_The only thing that's real_

_The needle tears a hole_

_The old familiar sting_

_Try to kill it all away_

_But I remember everything_

_What have I become, my sweetest friend?_

_Everyone I know goes away in the end_

_And you could have it all-_

_My empire of dirt_

_I will let you down_

_I will make you hurt_

_I wear this crown of thorns_

_Upon my liar's chair_

_Full of broken thoughts_

_I cannot repair_

_Beneath the stains of time,_

_The feelings disappear_

_You are someone else-_

_I am still right here_

_What have I become, my sweetest friend?_

_Everyone I know goes away in the end_

_And you could have it all-_

_My empire of dirt_

_I will let you down_

_I will make you hurt_

Elena made her way carefully through the tombstones, knowing instinctively that she would find him here. She wasn't sure how, she just _knew._ It had something to do with their connection- the same connection that Stephan obviously was disgusted by, and the same connection that she refused to give up. _He _was _her's_. He was _her _friend, her best friend. And she knew she was his only friend. Which was how she knew that something was wrong when he didn't return her texts or calls. He _always _answered immediately- hell, he was more faithful in that department than Stephan was. _Something is wrong_. She continued weaving her way through the tombs, desperation edging into her steps as she made her way in the general direction she knew the Salvatore crypt to lie in. When she finally stumbled upon the crypt it was to find a disturbing sight.

Damon was sitting on the edge of the roof of the crypt with his legs dangling over the edge. This wasn't the disturbing part. The disturbing part was the blood running down his forearm while he watched with an almost detached interest, the culprit of the injury gripped tightly in his other hand- a knife glinting in the sunlight.

"What have I become, Elena?" His voice startled her since she didn't even think he knew she was there.

"Damon, what are you doing?" Panic laced her own voice as she took in his relaxed demeanor, _he looked almost resigned_.

"I wanted to see if I could still feel it. I _wanted_ to feel it." He continued to watch the blood run in rivulets down over his wrist and onwards to his fingers, ending in a drip on his dark-wash jeans.

"Feel what, Damon?" She asked completely confused. His gaze finally travelled up to her own before he spoke.

"Pain."

She stared into his eyes which remained oddly blank, while her own showed a jumble of emotions- fear, panic, confusion, desperation.

"Damon, I don't understand. I-I don't- I- _please_ don't hurt yourself...please, Damon. Please, I-just talk to me...please, Damon." His eyes remained void of any emotion as he listened. His gaze dropped before he spoke.

"I'm in control, Elena. _This_ pain I can control."

Elena was flustered, she had no idea what to say to soothe him, to calm him, to _convince_ him to stop. She felt the tears rise in her eyes as she took him in- his dishevled appearance, his detachment to what he was doing to himself, his refusal to maintain eye contact with her, and the sadness that seemed to almost visibly be rolling off him in waves. She decided to try to use the control, the _hold_ she seemed to have over him to her advantage; Damon never refused her anything when she really wanted it.

"Damon?" she waited until his gaze slowly lifted to her own before continuing. "Please. Damon, for me, please come down here. I can't climb up there to you without falling and breaking my neck...so please come down. For me?" Her deep brown eyes pleaded with his crystal blue ones, as she hoped that he would acquience. She nearly gasped in shock when he suddenly appeared standing next to her. He carefully wrapped his non-bloody arm around her waist pulling her in to himself.

"Hold on to me." Elena wrapped her arms tightly around his middle, pressing her face in fear into his chest to hide her view. The next thing she knew they were standing on the roof of the crypt, and Damon was gently pulling away to seat himself once more on the edge. Elena cautiously moved to sit next to him- even though she knew her fear was irrational and that Damon would never let her fall off, it was hard to override her fearful instincts. She sat quietly next to him for a few and waited to see if he would speak, and when nothing was forthcoming she mulled over how best to start talking.

"Damon? What's wrong?" She turned her gaze and studied his profile as he gazed out into the surrounding woods. "What did you mean, that you can control this pain?" she asked in a voice so soft it was almost a whisper. He was silent so long she almost thought he wasn't going to answer her.

"It's physical, I can control it. I can't control what I feel anymore."

"Damon..."

"She ruined me. I changed _everything_ about me, so that she would love me and want to be with me. And she wasn't there. She wasn't there!" His quiet voice broke into a yell with his last three words. Elena watched as tears filled his eyes and he dropped his head. "After everything I did," he whispered, "She wasn't there. All the things I've done...I know Stephan thinks I don't care. That I block it out, and don't feel. And I did block it out, but it was for her. I just wanted her, you know?" Damon's gaze met her's for a moment and she nodded as tears streamed down her cheeks for this broken man next to her. "I'll never forget what I've done, or what I've become. I'm a bad person. Nobody likes me. I'm a monster...and it was all for her."

"Oh, Damon." Elena shook her head slightly as she reached out for his arm, and gently pulled him towards her. And he let himself fall. His body curled in towards her's as silent sobs shook his frame. "Damon..." she gently ran her fingers through his jet black hair in an attempt to soothe him. "You're not a bad person. You _are _good." She whispered in his ear. He shook his head to negate what she said, and pulled back in order to see her.

"I'm not good. You shouldn't even be around me, I'm not good for you." He started to move as if he was going to leave and Elena lunged for his arm, letting out a terrified scream as she slipped off the ledge she forgot she was on. Her fear was short-lived as she felt strong hands catch her arms in a firm grip, and she was quickly pulled back up. "Elena, are you okay?" The concern was evident in Damon's voice as he tilted his head to be able to see her face.

"Oh my God, Damon!" She locked her arms in a fierce grip around his waist as she pressed her face to his chest, her body trembling in his arms. He gently rubbed her back, and waited for her to calm down before leaning back slightly and taking her face in his hands.

"Are you okay?" She nodded, swallowing hard as the adrenaline still coursed through her.

"Thank you." He nodded, his previous concern still evident in his eyes. "Can we sit? Maybe not so close to the edge this time..." she smiled weakly at her own attempt at humour. He nodded once more and took her hand and helped her sit down, waiting until she was seated before sitting himself. Elena didn't release her grip on his hand- he wasn't leaving without her, and not until she was done talking.

"Are you sure you're okay?" She nodded and squeezed his hand reassuringly, wanting to relieve the concern still showing in his eyes.

"Alright, now what I was going to say before I almost lunged off the roof-" she paused, and smiled when she saw his familiar smirk break out on his lips...what she was hoping for.

"What I was going to say was...you _are good_, Damon." Seeing him about to protest Elena brought her free hand up, pressing her fingers to his lips to keep him silent. "I wouldn't be friends with you if I didn't think you were good. Yes, I know you've done bad things, and hurt people...but I also see the good things you do. I see the ways you are trying to change, Damon. I've noticed you don't feed on people anymore, I see you trying to get along with Stephan-and I know he isn't returning the effort, and I'm sorry for that."

"Don't apologize for him." Damon mumbled against her fingers. "Don't ever apologize for someone else." Elena frowned slightly but nodded.

"I know the things you did were because you were lonely, and angry, and abandoned by the people you care about...and that you were hurt, even if you try not to show it. And I know that doesn't mean that what you did wasn't wrong...but it also doesn't mean that you're a monster or a bad person. You _care_, Damon." Elena said, squeezing his hand to emphasize her point. "You care, and you are good, and you can be who you used to be before you were changed, if that's what you want. I believe in you." She smiled, hoping he would believe the truth she spoke. She watched the slight frown marr his face, his forehead creasing, his eyes turmoiled, as he thought over what she said.

"You won't be sad forever, Damon. I won't let you be." She promised him, squeezing his hand once more when he returned his gaze to her's.

"You'll leave eventually, Elena, to go on with your life. I'll still be here." He said, a certain resignation- or expectation of the inevitable in his voice- as he gently ran his thumb over her own.

"I won't ever leave you behind, Damon." She said, with a fierce emotion in her voice that he couldn't identify. " I could never just leave you, you're my best friend. I need you in my life...and I always will, that won't change." The look in his eyes at her words was something she couldn't identify, but it took her breathe away.

"You're my best friend too, Elena." He paused, his gaze flickering away before returning to her's once more, and she knew that what was coming was hard for him to say. "I don't want to disappoint you. Or let you down. Or hurt you. I don't want to lose you." It was hard for Damon Salvatore to admit that he had a weakness, and that that weakness was her.

She smiled, touched at his honesty. "You won't disappoint me, Damon. And I know you would never hurt me...and you're always there when I need you- my own personal protector." she giggled, drawing another smile out of him at the sound of her amusement. "And you'll never lose me, because I refuse to lose you." Tears filled his eyes once more at her words, and she reached up to gently brush one away as it rolled down his cheek.

"You're turning me into a sop, Elena." Damon joked, attempting to lighten the mood. She smiled, pleased to see his usual sense of humour returning. They fell into a companionable silence then, and Elena shifted to lean into his side without reliquenshing her grip on his hand. Damon looked down at the top of her head, a soft smile gracing his lips. Together they watched as the sun gradually diminished, and soon they were left with only the faint orangy hue on the edge of the horizon. Elena looked up at him.

"Let me walk you home." He stared into her eyes for a moment, and then broke into uproarious laughter at her statement (*authors note: the vampire male getting walked home by the human girl).

_ Things were going to be okay_. Damon wrapped his arm around Elena's shoulders as they made their way out of the cemetary and headed home.

_If I could start again_

_A million miles away_

_I would keep myself_

_I would find away_


End file.
